English

TEMPO

Detta har varit ett återkommande tema både för mig själv och de personer jag har samtal med.
Vi har en märklig förmåga att driva på.
Göra lite mer, lite bättre, lite snabbare.

Detta följs ofta av en mindre angenäm känsla.

Kanske är inte den där känslan en signal på att vi ska öka takten och hela tiden tänka en dag, en vecka eller ett år fram.

Kanske är känslan en inbjudan till att ”komma hem”, till att landa i stunden, till att lägga märke till var våra fötter är.

Kanske är känslan en signal på att vi har tagit tidsmaskinen lite för långt in i framtiden.
Att vi färdas lite för snabbt mentalt och att vi där med gör våld på oss själva.

Så.
Min ödmjuka inbjudan.

Rikta blicken inåt.
Vrid om det där inre reglaget.

Mjukna.
I sinnet. I kroppen.

”Slow down to the speed of life”
~David

I denna stunden

Oavsett vad du gått igenom.
Oavsett vad som pågår i ditt liv.

Ta denna stunden och fråga dig:
– Precis. Just. NU. Är jag OK?

Uppmärksamma hur det finns ett utrymme bortom det som pågår på insidan. Uppmärksamma att detta utrymme ‘håller’ vad det än är som stormar, stänger in, driver på.

Vila.

Ta denna stunden och fråga dig:
– Precis. Just. NU. Är jag OK?

Var denna stunden.

SLUTA – en repost

Detta är en post jag skrev på Facebook i början av året som min coachkollega Rasmus Carlsson sedan översatte till svenska.

 

Ibland när jag sitter i samtal med folk slår det mig att för somliga av oss (nyktra självhjälpoholister) är det enda som hindrar oss från att bara ha ett “bättre liv” det enkla faktum att vi så väldigt gärna vill ha ett “bättre liv”.

Förr eller senare kommer vi (tycker jag det verkar som) till en punkt när det är bäst att SLUTA!! Inte läsa ännu en bok, gå på ännu ett seminarium, anlita en coach eller ens läsa ett blogginlägg som det här. När det är bättre att gå in mer helhjärtat för själva livet och leka runt i det med större närvaro (vilket för mig ändå alltid har varit poängen med allt läsande och lyssnande).

Jag älskar känslan när jag tillåter mig själv att släppa de mentala koncepterna, idéerna och dogmerna om det “bättre liv” som jag har lyckats att tänka mig in i och i faktiskt återupptäcka LIVET. NUET. Återupptäcka neutraliteten i det. Återupptäcka enkelheten i det.

Ibland känner jag tyngden av hur allvarligt det har blivit. Ibland skrattar jag åt hur allvarligt jag i all min oskyldighet har gjort det.

Nu när jag sitter här säger jag detta:

Ingen bok har gett mig lika mycket som att minnas var jag har mina fötter och återupptäcka hur neutralt livet är i detta nu.

Ett “bättre liv” är inget vi presterar, utan något som vi slappnar av in i.

Med all min kärlek,
David

 

The small voice

Reflection from the seminar I ran this weekend with my colleague Martin Järnland  in Sweden.

 

I am paraphrasing here but at one point Martin said:

As soon as we feel like there’s a decision to made – we are coming from our head. When we’re coming from our heart (God/Mind/Universal intelligence) we already know what to do”.

How true that is. When there seems to be two or several good roads to take and decisions to make we are getting thrown around by our own mental fan like a lonely t-shirt in a laundry machine. When the fan stops and we calm down, there still might be a few good choices – but only one RIGHT one. And that’s a good question:

 

It might feel good, but does it feel right?

Our ego with all its storytelling can make a lot of things feel good – really good in fact. It can make us feel like the king of the world, like we’re the center of the universe. Just the other week I was walking home, really pumped up after a ‘career achievement’ and even though I felt the ‘high’ of the moment I realized I once again had been caught – Caught in my story about my self and the world.

 

Because as thrilling as that might be – Most of us seem to know that there’s something that isn’t quite RIGHT. Something feels a bit ‘off’ in this ego boost. From what I’ve seen so far, wisdom is that gentle, firm feeling of rightness. That small voices that is whispering all day everyday that we hear as the noise of our mental fan gets quiet.

 

If that voice says go – go.
If that voice says stop – stop.
If that voice says wait – wait.

 

With love,
David

David, vad är det du gör?

Under ett event jag deltog på i helgen fick jag flera gånger frågan:
– David, vad är det du gör och för vem?

Under en längre tid hade jag inte riktigt haft ett svar på den frågan, mer än: Jag pratar med folk. Det svar som dock kom fram klarare och klarare  denna helg var att jag har samtal med människor som vill ha mer ‘mentalt utrymme‘, inre ro och klarhet. Kort och gott – En rikare upplevelse av livet. De personer som verkar dras till mig och de samtal jag har är främst (men inte bara) duktiga, drivna, strävande och, med yttre mått mätt, framgångsrika människor men som fortfarande letar efter den där sista biten.

Att tillsammans kika i den riktningen och utforska den andra personens värld finner jag djupt tillfredsställande. Det känns som ett riktigt privilegie att få vara med när en person vaknar upp från sina historier om sig själv och ser den kristallklara neutraliteten i livet. Efter det ser helt enkelt världen lite (eller mycket) annorlunda ut.

 

Denna typen av meningsfulla samtal är det jag fyller min kalender med. Så;

Om du känner igen dig i det ovan nämnda eller känner någon som du tror skulle ha nytta av ett samtal, maila då till contact@davidandersson.org, så sätter jag av tid för ett första, utforskande, samtal.

(För det första samtalet avstår jag från min avgift)

Blir glad och tacksam för allt spridande av detta inlägg.

Allt gott,
David

Skapande inifrån-ut

När jag har meningsfulla konversationer med folk i skapartagen (entreprenörer/coacher/författare/etc.) och utforskar hur deras inre landskap ser ut kommer det emellanåt upp rädslor, osäkerhet, och tankar som tar dem ifrån det trygga stället i sig själva där all kreativitet härstammar från.

 

Hur arbetar vi då för att komma runt/över/under/genom det?

Vi går inte in i rädslan och badar i den.

Vi krossar inte gamla mönster av tankar genom de 11 senaste teknikerna.

Vi pratar inte om hur personen skall ta nästa steg för att bli en ‘bättre människa’ som får bättre resultat.

Vi har en meningsfull konversation och tittar i riktning av naturen av välmående, kreativitet, flow och trygghet.

 

Vi tittar i riktning av vad som är kvalitéer av vår essens. Det som finns kvar när vi slutar försöka vara perfekta, glada, starka, goa, kreativa, uthålliga och kärleksfulla. Det som ligger bortom den mask vi ständigt spenderar tid och energi på att förbättra i hopp om att livet ska bli något annat. Och vad händer?

 

Vi ‘hittar hem’. Tillbaka till vår grundinställning. Tillbaka till flow.

 

Som den fantastiske coachen Michael Neill säger:

”En pinne som flyter i en flod och fastat mot en sten behöver inte terapi – Den behöver bara en liten knuff!”

 

Kreativitet är en av många kvalitéer av vår essens och kan inte försvinna någonstans – Den kan bli temporärt begravd i tankar som vårt ego oskyldigt spelat upp för oss – Men aldrig försvinna. Du kan inte tappa något du är.

När vi slutar lägga all vår energi och kreativitet på att fixa oss själva innan vi tar nästa steg, skriver nästa ord, ringer nästa samtal och istället gör det vi skulle älska att göra. Då lägger vi återigen märke till vårt eget flow. Då börjar saker och ting röra på sig…

 

…. inte för att det egentligen finns någonstans att ta sig. Men mer om det i ett annat inlägg.

 

 

Allt gott,
David

 

 

 

 

 

Du har rätt till ett gott liv!

Vill du ha en meningsfull konversation om ditt liv, riktning eller drömmar – Kontakta mig så bokar vi in ett första utforskande samtal.

 

 

 

 

Potential for new thought

 When I talk to people from all walks of life I notice that people often want me to tell them what to think or to give them a strategy or technique for how to think in the future.

 

What they don’t see in the moment they ask that is that the right answer for them is within them – That the answers they’re looking for have always been and always will be within them and that they don’t need anything outside of them self to see it. The mental fan of thoughts that is spinning on the inside just have to slow down enough for a new insight to occur. In that inner quiet there is actually a real chance of seeing something new, something fresh, because that inner quiet – that nothingness – is the source of all new thought.

Now, we could get some new blades for the fan or paint the blades we have in prettier colors (and a lot of us do) and that might make it look better but the noise will still be there. The reason we feel stuck/stressed out/frustrated/sad is still there.

 

Here’s how I like to think about it:
[box]
Imagine walking in nature very close to were you live. As you walk around you stumble over a creek running through the landscape. Even though you haven’t seen the creek before (at least not that you can remember) you understand that it must have been there forever. You walk over, taste the water and get swept away by the fresh, natural feeling of it. You get so excited over what you’ve discovered that you bring a bottle of it home with you. From this moment on, this is the only water you want to drink.

But even though the water you bring home is clear and fresh for a day or two – you wouldn’t want to drink (or serve) that same water a week later. Now, If you didn’t realize that you lived so close to the source of this refreshing water it might make sense to study ‘watercontaining 101’ and buy new and expensive equipment to try to keep as much of the water fresh for as long as possible. But if you truly realized that that the creek is just a moment away and that you could return to it every day for a new bottle of fresh, nurturing water – It would probably not make sense for you to stress, sweat and work so hard at filling up your shelfs with fresh water.
[/box]

 

Our minds are just like this creek of fresh water. We have access to infinite potential of fresh, new thinking within us. From that source the right, organic solution or strategy for the moment we’re in will come. In fact – that’s the only place it could come from.

 

It seems to me that the moment our personal thinking (the mental fan) slows and we land in that inner quietness we either see the solution to the problem we’re having or that the problem doesn’t look like a problem any more. The more we allow ourselfs to walk through life with that inner quietness – the more of the well-being and the flow that we are shines into the world…

 

… and that inner quietness is just a moment away!

 

with love,
David

 

 

 

 

Would you like a conversation? Can I help you?

Contact me and we will book a conversationer in person, on phone or on Skype?

The neutrality of life

This weekend I visited London to spend some time with Chris Morris and Katie Abbott and attend their seminar ”Going with the flow”. Reflecting back on it, one of the insights I had during the weekend was about the total neutrality of life.

 

As we grow up we learn to label events, people and actions as good or bad, happy or sad, lucky or unlucky etc. For life to make sense, we put it into our mental boxes and hope that we’ll collect more of the ”positive” circumstances of life than ”negative”. When it looks like things on the outside determine how we feel, it makes sense for us to collect, save, achieve and do more stuff that seem to make us feel safe, loved, happy, peaceful and avoid the things that seemt to make us feel bad, sad, worried, stressed etc.

 

But if we look on the outside to change the experience of our life we are looking in the wrong place.

 

The reason I say this is because the situation, surrounding or person (like the one next to me talking loudly on his phone : -) is actually completely neutral. Completely. We’re not feeling our circumstances – we are feeling our thinking.

 

As I see it, life is actually much like a drawing book for kids – You get the form (the outline), but all the coloring is up to you. In other words, what happens in your life – happens. What you are feeling is your story about about what happens. The form is the form. Your thoughts are your thoughts.

 

Like lovely Katie Abbott so nicely put it this weekend: ”100% of my feelings are coming from my thinking”

 

So does that mean you should train yourself and work hard at ‘coloring your drawing book with nicer colors’ to have a richer experience of life?

No. Pushing yourself to think positive and managing your thoughts might feel better in the moment, but it tends to be exhausting and it’s still not the same as looking at the world with a still, clear mind.

Still mind. Won’t that get boring?

In my experience, no. The crispness of the now is the feeling we all are searching for. The inner joyful feeling of  being present and sensing life as neutral goes so much deeper than the ‘mood boosting activities’ that are common in the self help industry.

 

So what should I do when I find myself thinking negatively and feeling bad?

 

When people understand that 100% of our mood is coming from our thinking in the moment, but that our well-being/presence/life is separate from our mood, they realize that there’s nothing they have to do about their thinking and almost automatically they’re more able to let their thoughts pass and once again land in the neutracrispness of the now. Just like turning page in the drawing book…

 

….and in this ‘drawing book of life’ you will always have the chance of a new page – for a new experience of life.

 

 

With love,
David

 

 

 

 

Would you like a conversation? Can I help you?

Contact me and we will book a conversationer in person, on phone or on Skype?

 

 

There’s nothing to fix.

”You’re perfect! You truly are. There is nothing to be fixed, you are not broken. When you were born, you lived and acted from your well-being, happiness and inspiration – Your true self.”

As you probably know, this is the first thing you see when you enter my home page of this website. The reason I have it there is that so many coaching approaches are based on a belief that you have to fix your thinking or your circumstances. You will read stuff like:

  • Think positive!
  • Get better strategies and take the next step!
  • For every negative thought – think 3 positive thoughts!
  • 5 techniques to make you happy.
  • etc…etc…

 

I have no doubt that all of the above are well intended, and I have also been a fan of doing techniques, strategies and adapting new beliefs and behaviours to feel more happy, successful, lovable, alive, capable, etc.

The only problem is:

It’s based on a fundamental misunderstanding of the human mind and where our well-being comes from.

 

What all the ”ways to happiness” that is mentioned above is pointing to is that you need something outside of yourself to feel good, that there’s something that needs to get fixed. But it is not so. Happiness, well-being, love, presence is our natural state – they are qualities of our essence and the only thing that can come between us and the experience of our essence is thought. That’s all.

 

In other words, it’s is not circumstance that get’s in the way of you feeling good – it is that you think yourself away from your well-being.

 

Reflect upon it:

How much are you thinking in the moments you feel the most present, happy, calm, at peace?

and…

How much are you thinking in the moments when you feel stressed out, angry, disappointed, sad, etc?

 

When the people I work with see that we, as human beings, think up our experience moment to moment but that we aren’t our thoughts life gets simpler,more fun and drastically  ‘de-dramatized’ (yes I made that word up). When we get some distance from the dangers and dragons that we think up, they stop effecting us and it’s easier for us to let the thoughts pass – Like the lightposts on a highway or the clouds in the sky.

When our thinking slows down, we land in our natural state by default, therefore fixing, improving, add to or excluding from our thinking is unnecessary. It might even be contra productive as some techniques revs up our thinking.

 

Here is my view of it.

 

[box]

You don’t have to be good – You are goodness.

You don’t have to be loving – You are love.

You don’t have to be creative – You are creation.

You don’t have to be happy – You are happiness.

You don’t have to be powerful – You are power

You don’t have to be kind – You are kindness

You don’t have to be mindful – You. Are. Mind.[/box]

 

 

with love,

David

Landing in creativity

10 900 meters above sea. Heading home from a lovely holiday in Alicante, Spain with my family. Reflecting on the principles of our mind and the way they worked during the week.

After an intense six months of flying back and forth to Santa Monica to attend the Supercoach Academy the holiday with my family was perfectly timed. Lazy days at the beach, reading, eating a decent amount of paella and getting amazed by the 1 week long festival in Alicante.

 

When I look back at the week it started of with me thinking and reflecting on the last half year, my business, my own understanding of the inside-out nature of the mind and even though I was on this lovely holiday I wasn’t really present. Somehow, even though I tried my best not to, it seemed important for me to’think things through’. As the days went by my mental fan of thoughts slowed down. Less thinking – more being. Now, I was present. Now I was being on holiday. And in that being, by the end of the week, new inspired thought came in – as it will once there is space for it. All of a sudden I started to feel like creating.

 

See, that’s what happens when we let our thoughts pass us by, when we let ourself land in our own being. When our fan of thouhts are spinning fast, it makes sense to start doing, taking control and worry (because then, we argue, we will somehow be in a better place to go forward : -). But when we see that our best doing actually comes out of our being we’re willing to let our story about ourself and the outer world go and let creativity and intuition lead us. We let life unfold.

 

In our essense, we are creative, loving, caring, inspired, happy, intuitive people (there are very few depressed new born babies) and the only thing that will ever disturb our sense of that is our personal thinking in the moment. That’s all.

 

Have you also read/heard about an athlete that explains his/her achievment with ”It just happend!”?

Have you also read/heard about the artist what describes his music as running through him with a feeling of not being the one doing the playing?

Have you had moments when you did something perfectly without being able to really describe how you did it?

 

That’s what on offer when you start to look within, when you start looking at what is your true nature.

 

 

So. What will I create?

 

I don’t know, and I don’t have to right know. But at least now I have the space and the clarity to let it run through me. And it will.

 

 

 

Love,

David